Connection: You know when things just flow like a mid-summers breeze… conversation…laughter…getting each other’s jokes…touch…your inner child ventures out…you feel alive…happy…they get you, you get them…at peace…loving…kind…warm…and all the good things, that feeling of everything is right with your world.
This may sound like two people in love, but it can be about any one, any type of relationship – mother/daughter, husband/wife, female-female friends, female-male friends, male-male friends. It flows much easier when the combination is made up of soul mates, if we let it flow, instead of running away from the intensity of it.
The past month has been a little rough. We have both lost someone very close to us, a soul mate for sure, who connected to us both and taught us very important lessons about the parent:child relationship and connecting; about respect, valuing our own worth and feelings; showing us both how woman should be treated; and how easily we can get caught up in the stress of life. Someone who always had your back, was a rock when you really needed him to be and was always trying to get people together and connect with people. He was the soul of a party, had a hilarious, quick witted sense of humour, but also a soulful big heart connector who was in to meaningful connections.
Coming up to Christmas, it’s the first Christmas without him, the first Christmas his parents won’t have him there, his kids won’t have their dad. It’s a huge hole that can’t be filled. Family are making plans for where to go and asking if we are coming to them or going somewhere else, what presents to buy, and amidst the chaos of this decision making, a voice is saying, you know what, none of this matters.
All that matters, is connecting with the people that you love. Do presents create connections? They link to creating new memories, but if the presents weren’t there at all, wouldn’t we be forced to find the gift in just being present with one another, appreciating the time we are spending together and how lucky we are to have one another in our life?
A best friend this year is giving experiences instead of presents. I like this. Giving her children something that is active and creates an opportunity to experience life and bond and laugh and connect with one another. I am going to follow suit apart from a couple of little presents I had already purchased and a small Santa stocking. We are both taking our children to Wellington before Christmas (after securing $19 flights earlier in the year) and already seeking out all the low cost/free activities we can do together. With excited abandon we are going to hit the streets, grab all day bus passes, invade Te Papa, ride the cable car, go to Frank Kitts Park, swim at Oriental Bay, do coffee at the cafes, get a taste of the night life and connect with old friends.
Being a spiritual person, I thought I would google spiritual connection and found this great piece. It says that we are not living a life of solitary fulfillment. Our goal is connection, not personal perfection. We seek fulfillment so we can connect. Our lives are not about salvation, but rather about integration.
It says that every person on our spiritual level of existence is potentially one of the elements we need to form the next level of spiritual grouping. All the divisions we make between people obscure the fundamental motion toward spiritual connection which will make such physical divisions meaningless….How do we move on? What would spiritual “progress” look like? We progress by being able to combine with other spiritual beings at the same level of spiritual development to make a new group more advanced than any of us can be individually. ”
Connecting with someone today, they brought up about the Five Love Languages, something most have probably either heard about or read about at some point. It’s been a while since I looked in to this, but with four people connected to me in some way passing away in the past month, it has reminded me how short life is. We never know when someone we love or care about or enjoy in our life, simply may not be there tomorrow. I feel determined to connect better with friends and find ways to build better understanding and find ways to relate on a deeper level with my friends, family and daughter. The Five Love Languages leapt out at me with a hunger and promise of greater understanding and connection and what a perfect time of year for this. Not only can you gain a greater understanding of others, but also ultimately yourself and how you interact in your relationships.
